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Discussion in 'The Iron Maidens' started by Acujer, Apr 14, 2010.
Courtney, you are adorable in that pic! I love you so much my dear.
Swan, I like your post too.
Ok I admit it. I was totally heartbroken and wrecked from a cutey a few months back and it's taken me awhile to fully recover. My posts reflect how my mental state has been. I was torn to pieces. I finally am feeling myself again.
Try falling for a cutie then have your best friend(who all ready has a GF) swoop on her! You'll learn a whole new meaning of the word PAIN!!
I hear that Danny Boy!
By the way, Courtney, your look was not the style I was referring to.
Very true. Generally, stereotypes suck, especially when they are based on things like a person's appearance. Some guys treat women like crap, some women treat men like crap. No gender has a monopoly on that stuff. Yep, Im sure there are some ''cutesy girls'' who use their appearance to get what they want, and can be devious about it too. But to make out like all ''cutesy'' girls act like that is just stupid. You can get beautiful women who are lovely people, and others who are horrible. And the same goes for unattractive women.
I have heard unattractive girls (physically) be nasty about attractive girls just because they are attractive, which is just spiteful, and isnt a nice quality to have at all. I am definitely what most would class as (and I myself, would class myself as) ugly, in that I am very physically unattractive. I would be lying if I said sometimes that didnt get to me, and I dont find it hurtful at times, but I certainly wouldnt have a go at pretty girls just cos they are pretty. After all, you cant help your looks. To me, the inside of a person counts for much more than the outside. Both pretty and unattractive girls can be ugly on the inside. To brand someone a certain way personality wise just because of how they look, is pathetic, and small minded. A good person can come in all shapes, sizes and appearances, and same with bad people. And thats all at the end of the day, should be important. Judging a person's personality on their looks alone is just dumb in the extreme.
Just thought Id throw in my 2 pennies worth. lol
A prime example of that to an extreme would be Ted Bundy - the "good looking" serial killer. People would trust him because he was good looking and want to help him with his "injured leg" and end up a victim. 40 plus people murdered.
You know what's funny? I was actually going to mention Ted Bundy as an extreme example of that... lol
Most serial killers, peadophiles or whatever just look like normal, ordinary people. You cant tell whether a person is good or bad purely based on their looks.
And allow me to add,
Being attractive, or one of the Beautiful People, does NOT mean that you have to be stupid, shallow, spoiled or catered to ... it just enhances the possibilty.
The deciding factor ends up being in your personal nature, whether you feel connected or challenged, or inspired and driven to know or do more. Not all beauties are a waste of breath ... I submit the lovely gals of this band as prime examples of those driven to greatness, be it thru your skills, life, personality or ability to meet challenges.
I relate very much to Courtney's revealing admission, having been an overweight child myself, and subjected to the cruelty and exclusion by the "Beautiful" people. I finally grew out of it, but the self-loathing and introspection haunted me for a long time, well after I was skinny and popular, sometimes it still leaks out, but I understand myself better now. It's about freakin' time.
However, knowing those pains, and where they come from, and how they hurt, only serve to give me pause when I contemplate similar actions. The lack of distractions allowed me to pour myself into my studies, hobbies, and my career, ie, Electronics, Digital Engineering, Programming, guitar, leatherworking and custom wood crafting.
This is to say, that adversity can be turned into a positive force ... it's all about applying the lessons forward, not back.
Sadly though, because of my lung disease and limited stamina, I have again become a "fat bastard", but I don't hate myself for it, it's just the way it is, eh? I have not many regrets, I enjoy what I am, what I know, what I have accomplished ... I very often amaze myself, and I am thankful for every day.
Great post Swan!
I suffered a lot of bullying because of how I look, and it made me very introverted and cynical about human nature in general. If you are beautiful, cute, pretty, or whatever, then you do have a much better chance of being treated better by society, which is a sad but true (quote Metallica!) fact of life. I threw a lot of my frustration due to this into my guitar playing. Because I love music and metal, it was just a natural thing for me to want to do. And it also made me feel a bit better about myself because for so long id been made to feel useless, and good for nothing by other people purely based on my appearance. There has been times Ive hated myself, which is stupid I know, because I cant help the way I look, but there have definitely been times when I have felt like that.
But when all is said and done, it is the inside of a person that counts. And I think its sad that so many in our society place so much emphasis on outer beauty, as if its of more, or even equal importance to inner beauty, because it isnt. Its definitely worse if you're female, because so many judge so much of your worth as a person solely on appearance. Its definitely not as bad for guys. To close, I remember a friend once asked me something interesting. If I would trade my beautiful personality for physical attractiveness, and I immediately answered ''no''. As much as I hate being outwordly ugly, I definitely wouldnt trade that for outer beauty if the payoff was being ugly on the inside. As much as society loves to feed us the opposite, the inside of a person is of far more importance than the outside.
Exactly, the lessons learned by NOT having everything given to you, will serve you well, all your life. This also goes to those who work hard to achive their craft or simply work hard to be better people. Those who have become accustomed to being treated better simply because of their appearance will soon learn the sad truth that age spares no one.
When everything else stretches and sags, let's hope your brain remains firm and your friends always taut.
There's a very true lyric in the song Affirmation by Savage Garden, "I believe that beauty magazines promote low self esteem." When I was younger, too many times would I look through these magazines and think "I wish I looked like her" and then feeling down cos I knew I never would etc. I also got picked on alot for my height. People who know me, know how much I absolutely hate being tall. I still get judged to this day about it, with people thinking I must be scary and intimidating and I'll beat them up etc. Something which saddens me greatly cos it couldn't be more wrong. I just hope that talking to me can change their minds about me. Unfortunately, human nature seems to be very judgemental so I guess there's not much we can do eh?
I am me. what you see is what you get.
usually 275 pounds of attitude and indifference......but i do have a gentle and caring side. those that know me well understand where my poor attitude comes from and exactly what it is.
theres things i would like to change about myself, but if i do i change for me not because someone wants me to change.
i was bulied at school, physically and mentally.....until i snapped and fought back. most of those who bullied me are still shit scared of me now.....and i like that.
Lots of good, well thought out, insightful posts here. Since I started this thread, I'd like to point out what most of you are discussing strays from what my original point was. I think what I was pointing out is that females who are very cutesy looking, like baby little girl tiny cute, tend to get away with a lot and tend to be catered to. If they happened to be someone of poor character, noone expects it to be her, because she's so sweet looking. That the human mind equates cute with benevolent.
Yes and no. Your original post is pretty much talking about judging people on how they look, which is what we're also discussing.
Since the original post was a tiny bit vague, and totally out of the blue, we have been discussing the breadth and depth of the subject. I don't think we are very far off point, just encompassing different genders and aspects of same.
Glad you could come back and join our lively discussion.
That's called stereotyping based upon LOOKS. Which, as a fan of a female band, you should know better. CC is cute, so she gets away with a lot and gets catered to?
Do I not type proper English or do you guys just not read what I write? Every post I type is completely misunderstood.
COURTNEY IS NOT AT ALL WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT HERE! I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT HER STYLE! She does not fit the description at all.
Everything I type is misunderstood.
I don;t care if the type of girl I'm describing is great or evil, the world will all treat them the same. They are worshipped and catered to. Open your eyes! It's not rocket science.
This is all just way lame!
hhah i wish!
so what you calling me Ug-a-ly? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA jk