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Interesting/Amusing News Articles

Discussion in 'LORD' started by Lord Tim, Jun 18, 2009.

  1. Lord Tim

    Lord Tim That guy from LORD

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    We have a videos thread, so how about stuff you read in the news or see on TV?

    I'll start - I found this pretty funny when I read it:

    (source)

    OK, so big deal, a band was forced to cancel due to poor ticket sales. But the hilarious bit is this:

    HUNDREDS? HAHA! For a band that was booked to play Rod Laver Arena and other places like that, mentioning that it was hundreds instead of thousands is both kind of a telling blow of how many tickets were actually sold and a hell of a razz at 'em by the media. :p

    Oh well, time to get my ticket refunds now... :( HAHA!
     
  2. Goreripper

    Goreripper Metal as fuck

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    Until you pointed it out, I missed it. That is pretty funny though. The best one of the week is the dumb bitch who got her face tattooed and then changed her mind though.
     
  3. cowboy

    cowboy Member

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    Cracked m up that did :)

    Funny thing LT, I was thinking earlier today that a thread like this would be handy. Because I found this:

    Lookout Sydney males

    Lucky we're a long time from summer - plenty of time for you singles to find someone to snuggle :)
     
  4. Lord Tim

    Lord Tim That guy from LORD

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    ^^ Oh dear! :ill:

    Yeah, seriously... you do NOT fall asleep when you get a tattoo, especially when you get a FACE tattoo... especially when you get like 56 of them or however many she got. What a load of shit!
     
  5. matt2006

    matt2006 Member

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    I caught the 'hundreds' thing first read through, then lol'd.

    That tattoo girl is so dumb- besides all of the obvious, why would a professional tatto artist 'force her' (as her story goes) to get 56 facial tattoos instead of 3? She obviously wanted that many, then her dad flipped... so excuse time!
     
  6. Goreripper

    Goreripper Metal as fuck

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  7. Si

    Si The Trickster's Bitch

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    Have you seen the tattooist though? He doesn't really look capable of understanding why three small stars on a girl's forehead is different to sixty-odd stars all over her face. By the look of him he probably saw it as an extremely subtle alteration to the design.

    Besides, when we say she "fell asleep", it's probably safe to assume she "passed out" because of "intoxication".
     
  8. Celestial-Todd

    Celestial-Todd The Incredible Bulk

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    My money is still on "excuse given to cover up her mistake"
     
  9. Trephinator

    Trephinator The Mongrel

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    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/new.../Alice-Cooper-fan-hit-man-with-false-leg.html

    "A rock fan removed his false leg during an Alice Cooper gig and punched a fellow fan in the face 10 times after he was asked to calm down, a court heard.

    Andrew Miller, 46, allegedly lashed out after John Lynch, who was sat in the seat next to Mr MIller, asked him repeatedly to stop flailing about and keep to his own seat.

    Southampton Crown Court heard Mr Miller had been "shouting and whooping" and had stripped down to his bare chest and removed his false leg."
     
  10. Coma1

    Coma1 Member

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    I used to run a thread daily on the leicohtica forum called 'today in the news', so provided I remember to come back often expect horrible news from me...

    US man 'posed as his dead mother'
    A New York man has been arrested for impersonating his dead mother in order to claim $115,000 (£70,500) in social security benefits and rent subsidies.

    news story here;
    http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/8106010.stm?lsf
     
  11. Coma1

    Coma1 Member

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    Lawmaker returns joke gift from Schwarzenegger
    A bull testicle sculpture for Sen. Darrell Steinberg was meant as a prod to help with tough budget choices.

    Reporting from Sacramento -- As lawmakers wrangled last week over how to plug California's giant deficit, the governor who once called them "girlie men" sent the state Senate leader a package that has some Capitol insiders tsk-tsking over what they see as an ill-timed display of machismo.

    The gag gift from Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, a metal sculpture of bull testicles, came with a note suggesting the lawmaker would need them to make some tough budget choices, said legislative sources who were not authorized to speak publicly.

    more here;
    http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/nation/la-me-arnold-gift18-2009jun18,0,3589705.story
     
  12. Shadow298

    Shadow298 UNLEASH THE GUAN

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    Fark.com

    all the links you will ever need. :D
     
  13. Goreripper

    Goreripper Metal as fuck

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    Actually, a guy with that much body modification would know more than almost anyone to be fucking careful. He even had a photo of her in his shop which she'd obviously posed for after the event.
     
  14. flip`

    flip` Your mother was a hamster

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  15. Lord Tim

    Lord Tim That guy from LORD

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    "is it raining?" "mate, it's pissing down" / pissed off / what a pisser / tinkle tinkle little star / etc. etc. :)
     
  16. Si

    Si The Trickster's Bitch

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    There's a wee hole in the roof.
     
  17. Lord Tim

    Lord Tim That guy from LORD

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    From http://www.news.com.au/story/0,27574,25676214-401,00.html

    SURPRISE! :rolleyes:
     
  18. Celestial-Todd

    Celestial-Todd The Incredible Bulk

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    If I was the tattooist, I'd be counter suing for loss of income and slander
     
  19. Si

    Si The Trickster's Bitch

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    Police clear street over kids' 'nuclear reactor'

    Two six-year-old boys pretending to have built a mini nuclear power plant has prompted German police and the fire brigade to clear their street, authorities said.

    The school children in the western town of Oelde had built the nuclear reactor mock-up out of a computer casing and taped a "radioactivity warning" they had printed out from the internet on its side.

    "When the boys returned to their 'nuclear power plant' from a brief stop at home they were sent away again as the area and a wide radius around it had been cleared and blocked off," police said in a statement.

    Residents were ordered not to leave their homes and firefighters tested for a radioactive leak.

    The boys' parents thought the fire department was conducting a drill until they read about the operation online and what led to it.

    They reported to the police station and explained their six-year-olds had not managed to build an actual nuclear reactor.

    - AFP
     
  20. Goreripper

    Goreripper Metal as fuck

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    That's the awesomest thing I've read all day.
     

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