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Discussion in 'GMD Social Forum' started by damnromulans, Jun 28, 2010.
I can't tell if you're being sarcastic but you're welcome haha
I'm serious. I've been saying the same exact things you've just said for literally years now. My only problem is I'm not a chick so people were taking my advice with a grain of salt I think.
Ahhh gotchya...well, you were spot on!! Haha I have no idea why guys over complicate things the way they do...I'm glad at least you get it!
I'm quite excited, got only 12 days now until I'm in Chicago. The primary purpose of it being for a concert has really changed over these last few days. Now I'm really quite more excited about meeting this girl
Been spending the better part of my nights the last two weeks talking and camming with each other - and there is really something to be said for being able to just lay there in the dead of night, no words being said, and nothing but our smiles communicating everything that need be communicated.
Mort, the same thing's happening to me. Except I'm not meeting her, she's above the age of consent, and that "nothing but our smiles communicating everything that needs to be communicated" thing.
I wouldn't give up yet. You still seem to have chemistry with her, and actual, legitimate feelings are so damn rare. I wouldn't let go of that. Seriously, I see relationships of people of all ages who claim they're in love yet can't even seem to carry a conversation.
Oh fuck you all.
I found getting women drunk opens up their gaping assholes for penis insertion.
I need to get laid. It's been awhile.
Honestly it isn't funny anymore, but whatever. To validate your responses despite my know-better-than-to she's 18.
You should just stop taking those comments seriously and embrace them. I mean shit, half of the fuckers on this board can barely talk to a bitch let alone fuck her (legal or not).
Which is why it would be best to try to be best friends at this point and not let the past hold you back. Having someone of the opposite sex as a best friend is invaluable. My first girlfriend and I are just such friends now.
Of course not all girls are like that. If every girl was the same, no one would even be having this discussion because the same thing would work on everyone. I'm just saying that over the course of my 19 years of being a female in this world, that's an observation I made that applies to MOST of the girls I've met.
And you're totally right, it probably would be better for girls to just shut a guy down...but that's not how most of them work...a lot of girls don't have the balls to do that, because as much as it sucks for you, it sucks for us too! People generally don't like inflicting heartache on others. And yes, most girls are totally wish washy and indecisive, and it probably is annoying, so as much you may wish for a girl to be upfront and blunt, chances are it's not gonna happen. They don't think logically and sensibly like guys do...they act on emotion, not rationality.
Lastly, any guy can be confident. I don't care if you're the shyest guy in the world. There is a massive difference between being confident and being cocky. Confidence in my opinion, is being content with who you are and always sticking to what you believe in....neither of those things necessarily involve being loud or outgoing. It's sexy for a guy to feel good about himself- when they are self conscience and let people walk all over them- not sexy!! That's all I'm getting at. Introverted people can still exude a sense of confidence even while maintaining a humble disposition...it truly comes from the manner in which you see and present yourself.
Again, you may not agree and that's totally cool, just throwing stuff out there from a girl's perspective.
But now I have question for all you guys on here--
Do you have to look metal as fuck for a metal guy to be into you?? I don't have crazy hair or facial piercings, I guess I look...idk, kinda natural I suppose...but every time I'm at a show, metal guys are ALWAYS with the hardcore metal chicks. It's just shitty, metal is my life but it's like metal guys don't see that because I don't have black hair and tattoos everywhere. I know there must be some guys out there who aren't necessarily into just that, but are girls like that preferable??
I think this is common for INTJ. I have the same problem.
I don't really go for metal chicks, all the girls I've dated and been with are usually not into metal AT ALL and look pretty normal. They aren't even hipsters or alternative when it comes to dressing. Metal chicks aren't really preferable for me, I've never been into the look anyway.
Then again... I don't look metal at all. I don't have long hair, I don't wear metal shirts anymore and I don't have tattoos or piercings. I have no desire to want to look "metal". Taste in music is enough.
I have the same problem as well. I've had girls and some close friends tell me that. I also got told after an interview that I was overbearing, almost to the point of arrogance. I actually laughed loudly at the HR lady. There was this other girl in there who was fucking annoying as all shit because she kept on talking and never shut up. I felt like throwing a brick at her face. Those feelings probably seeped out while I was talking when I was finally allowed to say something.
Some guys just aren't wired that way and telling them to exude confidence yet steer clear of cocky just tends to confuse more than help. Being totally content with who you are doesn't guarantee you won't get your knickers in a bunch when you meet someone you really like. Bottom line is that no matter what kind of dude you are, it's never a good idea to try acting like someone you're not. Girls pick up on that shit from a mile away and suddenly they stop taking you seriously (then again that applies to most other people too). Different people like different things - one person is simply never going to please everyone and anyone. If it doesn't work out with that certain someone you've had your eye on, then like ajhart said: big fucking deal. Chances are someone else will like you far better just for being you.
Personally I prefer initial awkwardness to try-hard "confidence". Makes me feel like what's going on actually matters to the other person and that they're being genuine about it. Besides, if the chemistry's there, that awkwardness will more often than not melt away as you get to know each other and become more comfortable in each other's company.
Metal is not a prerequisite for me, but it helps. The last two girls I've been with are into Metal and the current one has the look (wears black, has dark hair with red highlights, fair skin, wears lots of jewelry and mjolnirs) and that look is particularly attractive to me.
As far as their attraction to me, my long blonde hair has been a turn-on, but that's not necessarily because it's "metal." My physique has probably more to do with their attraction. I lift weights and am very fit but I'm not broly at all.
"Bottom line is that no matter what kind of dude you are, it's never a good idea to try acting like someone you're not."
That's exactly my point...be happy with who you are!! That to me, is confidence.
And you're right, sometimes it is hard to be confident without appearing to try too hard...takes practice I guess...but what I'm trying to get across with the initial confidence suggestion is that it really does help put a girl at ease and make her more willing to step out of her comfort zone and accept that date! But again, every girl is different, so just use your judgment.