@hyena: You did what needed to be done, and in a very civilized, even neat manner. About loosing him in particular: It is a huge pity, but remember he was already taken anyway. About being able to find someone else as cool as him: It is very possible that you will find someone, after all you are socializing with "the right people" in your environment. Unfortunately, some questions will remain unanswered, you know which questions those are. The only thing I can tell you is that either the answers will be revealed, or the questions will eventually stop being as relevant as they seem to be right now. About hurting him: Remember he's married, he does have someone who will be there for him when he feels down (even if he can't talk about this with her). His life is already arranged and he is not particularly away from happiness. His marriage, if dull, is also apparently stable. Soon he will continue with his life, maybe even have kids, etc. He's on the "right" path. So, now that it's over (unless it was an emotional fake-up), stop worrying about him, and start caring about yourself. You don't need those feelings, you don't want that agony, so I suggest you unleash all your negative feelings in any way you see fit, such as crying, singing, growling, screaming, etc... But after you do that, move on, and stop thinking about how amazing your life would have been with him, because you're not getting a life like that if you don't get over your present situation. May the Hypercosmic Gods strengthen your essence, so that you can keep on pursuing your goal of developing your pectoral muscles.