man, the Weekly World News has been hittin' the note lately!!
HOW TO SCORE WITH HOT BABES AT THE SUPERMARKET!
By MARK MILLER
Forget singles bars, on-line dating, and friends fixing you up on blind dates -- if you're really serious about finding a date, you'll head to your local supermarket!
So says Rod Forqeuwe, author of the upcoming self-help book, Bagging More Than Groceries. Forqeuwe has many techniques to help men score. "The produce section is filled with phallic shaped fruits and vegetables," Forqeuwe observes. "Pick one up, hand it to the woman you want, and ask if she can help you tell if it's ripe. If she's interested in you, she'll actually start to subconsciously caress it."
Similarly, in the meat section, Forqeuwe recommends handing your targeted hottie a rump roast and asking, "Can you tell me if my rump is tender enough, or will I need to take it home and beat my meat?"
The theory here, according to Forqeuwe, is to get her smiling. "Once she's smiling, she's in a receptive mood to be asked out."
One time, Forqeuwe held up two packages of chicken breasts so that the woman's breasts were in between them, and innocently asked, "Excuse me, could you help me choose which of these breasts would be most succulent in a white cream sauce?"
Forqeuwe remembers cooking her breakfast the next morning.
Published on: 03/30/2005
By MARK MILLER
Forget singles bars, on-line dating, and friends fixing you up on blind dates -- if you're really serious about finding a date, you'll head to your local supermarket!
So says Rod Forqeuwe, author of the upcoming self-help book, Bagging More Than Groceries. Forqeuwe has many techniques to help men score. "The produce section is filled with phallic shaped fruits and vegetables," Forqeuwe observes. "Pick one up, hand it to the woman you want, and ask if she can help you tell if it's ripe. If she's interested in you, she'll actually start to subconsciously caress it."
Similarly, in the meat section, Forqeuwe recommends handing your targeted hottie a rump roast and asking, "Can you tell me if my rump is tender enough, or will I need to take it home and beat my meat?"
The theory here, according to Forqeuwe, is to get her smiling. "Once she's smiling, she's in a receptive mood to be asked out."
One time, Forqeuwe held up two packages of chicken breasts so that the woman's breasts were in between them, and innocently asked, "Excuse me, could you help me choose which of these breasts would be most succulent in a white cream sauce?"
Forqeuwe remembers cooking her breakfast the next morning.
Published on: 03/30/2005
